Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Developing at His Own Pace

It seems like there is so much pressure put on these little infants in the first year. Sure, doctors call it "developmental milestones," but in reality, it is a set of rules that these babies must pass in order to be "normal." (Don't even get me started on that word)

So Jon and I stress and worry over every little hurdle that JD must go through. It is like a training facility here at our house. We're turning JD into Rocky Balboa.

At 3 months, I was working diligently with JD on rolling over - back to front, front to back, head over feet (just kidding - he doesn't need help with that one). For about a month, he would only do it for me when we were at home alone. I don't think Jon really believed he could do it. Then one day, he was rolling all over the place.

Same thing with the sitting and crawling. Jon would come home every night for "maximum crawling practice" with JD - tempting him with the remote control and telephone. Then one day, he was belly crawling all over the place with no motivation needed!

But what is sad is that we put such importance on these milestones that we can't even enjoy the stage that he is in. It is off to the next milestone (for us it will be walking, talking). Because if he isn't doing these things by the "right" time, then he might have something like autism or another developmental disorder.

On that note:
Does anyone else get tired of hearing all of the (what I call) scare propaganda out that is being forced down our throats about autism? It seems like these news sources want you as a parent to try and analyze every thing your babies are doing (or not doing) for this disorder. Is this a case of too much information?? Are we as parents looking for something that isn't there because news sources have planted the suggestion in our heads?

Autism is a serious disorder and if we had a child with it, then we would handle it with all of God's love and strength behind us. But I wouldn't want to worry about it and push my child to get to the next milestone so that I miss out on what he is doing right now.

I am going to take a deep breath and just enjoy JD for awhile just as he is. Because he is in a particularly cute stage right now, belly crawling and sitting and clapping and laughing. I thank God for his sweet little smile that melts my heart every time he looks into my eyes.


Lynn Leaming said...

I just got back from Kauai and noticed your posting on Heather's blog and led me to your blog. I have had fun reading your post and catching up on your life with John and J.D. Not ever being blessed with children myself I have no knowledge of the experiences. But it has been fun over the years watching first time moms versus moms with multiple children. I do hope that you will be able to find complete joy in each stage that J.D. is in as it all seems to go by so quickly.

owldog1 said...

I also just found your blog and agree on the 2 much info. with my granddaughter way more worry about "milestones" then with my kiddos.

i agree feel blessed with each day and enjoy

Dara said...

Keep the milestones in perspective... there is a WIDE range of ages for these milestones... so don't worry about them. Mom tells us all the time about the variances between our developmental milestones and both of us grew up being able to function well as children and adults.

JD is super happy and healthy... so just enjoy! He is such a cutie! Love my little nephew to pieces!

Becky said...

Even if you didn't work with him on the milestones, he would figure them out within a reasonable time frame on his own. Babies just do this stuff. I know because I haven't helped Lucas with anything- just too busy, and he has figured it out within the normal ranges. But I did obsess with the milestones more with Ava, my first. You are right to sit back and enjoy whatever stage he's in, because it will be over in the blink of an eye.